Trust...hmmmm to only know what that feels like.

I do not trust. How do you love if you do not trust? A new chapter…a new phase…a new experience I am dealing with. I trust nobody but God. My love…he trusts nobody either. Is that our common ground? Is that why we stay together? Are we together? He says so…but I do not trust. What I envision…does it exist? He says so. But does it exist with him? What do I do? Well...I choose to keep loving, myself and my love, and one day in love I will land where I am supposed to be. My love…I am learning to trust him. I have to in order to be truly free and truly open...right? Otherwise this merry-go-round is gonna keep going around...unless I just get off. It's like I'm on the horse that doesn't go up and down...I'm enjoying the ride, but I want my horse to go up and down too...do I stay on the horse and be grateful for the ride...do I get up and try another horse that I know will go up and down...or find another ride completely? Make sense?