One Minute to Spare

So I ran my first 10k today... a race I was supposed to run five years ago but couldn't go because my baby was sick. Well anyway... I was pumped! So excited I could have peed myself (literally)... I just couldn't bring myself to use the port-o-potty lol I had worked last night which meant I got off work this morning... and went straight to the race.

So many people! So many fans and runners. Very neat experience because there were over 80,000 people who attended. Some dressed in costumes, parents ran with their young children, several had their watches ready and some brought their gameface.

That was me... I brought my gameface. I had a specific goal I wanted to achieve... run the race in less than an hour. I didn't care if my time was 59min59secs... I just wanted to finish 6.2miles in less than an hour. I didn't even wear my headset for fear it would be a distraction to have to hold my phone.

I took my place at the start.. and was off! First three miles... great. Enough space, felt good, and didn't feel tight or stiff. Fourth mile... started off great... but then I walked for a few secs. Got some water and kept it moving. Was still making great time. Fifth mile was a little tough. The sun was in front of us and really started to beam down. I walked another few seconds but got annoyed when people kept passing me and started running again. The sixth mile... O...M...G. Where the HELL was the finish line???!!! By then it started to get crowded. Everyone was making their way to the finish and all I wanted was to see the big finish line banner. It was nowhere in sight. I was haulin ass! (but probably looked like I was dying). I kept telling myself to just turn over your feet and you will get there. It took FOR-EV-ER to get there... but finally I saw it... the finish line! I hauled ass as best as I could cause by then my lungs were hurting. My watch said an hour.. but the people around me said 55, 54, 56 minutes is what they had on their watch.

I crossed the finish line. THANK GOD! I felt accomplished but super curious because I didn't know my time, but overall I was proud. I did it.. FINALLY. I celebrated with brunch with a friend.. then returned home. After only getting 3-4 hours of sleep at work, then running a 10k immediately thereafter... i was EXHAUSTED. Sleep took over me and I rested.

So I'm sure you're wondering... did I reach my goal?? I woke up and looked up my results.

60min47secs.

I couldn't believe it. My heart sank. I felt defeated. I didn't reach my goal. Hauled ass and still missed it. My mind kept rewinding... I shouldn't have walked. I should have kept running. Those walks cost me my minute.. I could have finished in less than an hour if I didn't walk. I should have picked it up at mile five instead of six. Shoulda, coulda, woulda... With only ONE minute to spare, what did I do wrong that cost me that minute????

Isn't this the story of life? When things don't go the way we plan, we think back to what we could have, should have, or would have done differently. The fact is, I probably could have practiced more, or ran a little harder, but I didn't. However, I KNOW I did my best today and gave 100% on that course. I left depleted with nothing left to spare.

This is how I approach my life as well. Things don't always go the way I plan, but at least I can always look back and know I tried my best.

Since I didn't make my goal, I now have another goal. I also know what I need to work on when I practice and have a better idea of how to pace myself for my next race. I learned something today... what more can I ask for. Same goes for life... I learn from my life and try to make changes and do better for next time. Because until you die... there will always be another day ahead of you.

You can't change the past, but damn sure can make changes for the future.