Just Me

My thoughts are all over the place. I start to write one thing.. scratch that. Write something else. Scratch that.. I forget where I was going with it. Scratch that.. it's not at the forefront of my brain.

FOCUS. What is pressing so hard against my scull.. trying to break free? What is it that I MUST get out at this very moment.. in this very blog.

It's just me. I started to write a poem about it... but it just wasn't flowing because my thoughts are so scattered that the phrases just weren't making sense. But then again... it's a poem right.. they hardly ever make sense anyway.

It's just me. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.. I just know.. it is what it is.. just me. You ever have somebody tell you, "It's not you, it's me." I've said that before... a few times I lied cause lawd knows it was NOT me lol... however, the majority of the time, if I said it.. I meant it. I don't know... remember when I said I was waiting for an answer and I was pretty sure my answer would come real soon? (in a previous blog). Well... I got my answer.

It's just me. And at this point in time... for some reason... it is just supposed to be me. I guess I am okay with that... I mean it DOES make sense. But right now... I'm really not in the mood to make sense. I'm not in the mood to learn another lesson or to have some grand epiphany.. Is it possible to go ONE day without learning something? or realizing something? I guess not. I suppose you should be dead if you really want life to stop. That's basically what life is.. you know this right.. living and learning.. every.freakin.day. Yup.

I am sitting here... in the dark per-say... with my Christmas lights lighting the room. It's beautiful. And just like that... emotional. UGH. I've come along way. And I am okay with it being just me. After all.. I like me.. so its all good. Goodnight.