HIPAA

So...you ever want to talk about something, because you know you need to talk about it...but don't really feel like talking about it...or not have anybody to talk to? Or maybe you have somebody to talk to, but you really don't want to talk to that person because you really don't know that person, but you do know that person understands what you are feeling. You still wit me?

So...yea. That's what's on my mind. Don't get me wrong, I think I am okay. I just wonder who I will talk to when shit REALLY hits the fan. I have my homegirls you know....but they are in different states. So tonight I sit here and wonder....who can I run to???...lol SWV moment...but really, I do wonder who. I don't just talk to anybody. And somebody already knows that...so I am a little pissed at that somebody because they are a non-muthafuckin factor now. lol huhhhhhh i'm sorry I can't help it...that's not true, but that somebody really isn't a somebody I want to talk to for a while. So now I have to find a NEW somebody...but I don't like doing that either. Why? Because if you really knew me...you'd know I move at a handicapped, shell's too heavy snail-pace when it comes to really talking to someone...let alone trusting someone.

I'm in a really weird position. With my new job, I have a LOT of eyes and ears on me. People want to know what I'm thinking, how I'm dealing, what's my next move, will I fuck up and when/how, what's my motive, do I have an agenda...etc. They want to basically understand ME. Mmmmmm...not gonna happen. Unless you read and are able to make sense of my blogs :) But even so...you think you know...but you have no idea....

I titled this HIPAA because of that privacy act. You ever worked at a job where you have to abide by the HIPAA law? Pretty much everyone falls under that act at some point. I used to work at a pharmacy so I would see people I knew, get prescriptions for things I would have never thought...feel me? So I couldn't talk to ANYBODY about it because you never know who knows someone who knows someone. None of my jobs are worth the risk of divulging someone's privacy. How I feel right now fits somewhere along those lines. Because of my job, I am pretty sure I will have this type of feeling a LOT. So instead of me going out and searching for a new ear...I think I will just pray on it for now. I don't have a dying desire or need to share my true thoughts today, but I know that time will come sooner than later.

Peace out...I'm going to bed.